Counselling Therapy Treatment

FREE STUFF

Immediate Access to Counselling, Treatment, Therapy, Hypnotherapy, Family Support, Couples, Anxiety, Stress, Anger Management, Motivation, Coaching, Pain Control, Relaxation and all the other Service we Offer

10 Easy Ways to Feel Great

Laugh more unless you feel like crying.
Laughter lowers blood pressure, reduces stress hormones, boosts immune function and triggers the release of endorphins which produce general feelings of well-being.
Find new ways of bringing laughter into your life on a regular basis - rent a comedy on DVD, go to a comedy club, read a funny story or tell a joke.
On the other hand, if you feel like crying, make time to feel your feelings. Stop fighting feelings, feel them, look for the gift in each one and practise letting go.
Learn to swim downstream with the current!
So many of us waste time worrying about things over which we have no control. Focus on what you can control –YOU! For example, you can decide what you will learn, how much you will laugh, where you are going, what you will think about and how you choose to feel. You can realise your options and make new choices.
Be Kind To Yourself!
Take the scenic route whenever you can. Plan and make time for yourself. Plan ‘windows’ of opportunity to do nothing but be kind to yourself. Pay attention to negative self-talk and replace those critical words with kindness and understanding for yourself. In essence you have to nurture what you want to grow
Exercise
Exercise can decrease stress hormones like cortical and increase endorphins, giving your mood a natural boost. Negative emotions can be effectively released and transformed into motivation for increased health and well-being.
Struggle is a choice!
Struggle is a choice but it is also a sign that you could be making a better one. Change happens when you give up struggle and choose to be calm.
Overhaul your expectations
Be mindful of your expectations and understand that they are driving you. Expectation and disappointment go in hand in hand. First we are swept along by expectation - then by disappointment and surprise.
Expectation and disappointment will always be a part of life - Check where yours are taking you by making a list headed ‘Expectations I have held that hold me back.’
Learn to relax with uncertainty
It’s a fact, that the only certain things about life are uncertainty, birth and death. Learn to relax with uncertainty, embrace it even and develop tolerance of it, especially as change is inevitable. A sense of control over our lives is essential for our health and happiness but no human being has ever known what lies around the corner. Being prepared for change is a positive attribute that decreases the risk of experiencing stress reactions like anxiety and poor health.
Develop new ways of calming yourself
Most arguments are not really about right or wrong. They are really about ‘my needs’ versus ‘your needs’. Accepting that this is the case enables us to begin negotiation and work towards a compromise.
Knowing how to calm ourselves is an essential life skill and means that we can begin to think clearly and resolve our problems.
Begin by using the 7/ 11 breathing technique in which you breathe in to the count of 7 and out to the count of 11. By ensuring the out breath is longer, deeper and slower than the in breath, it will automatically stimulate the parasympathetic nervous system and the relaxation response.
Stop ‘must-erbating’
If you are a perfectionist who imposes conditions upon yourself such as ‘musts, ought’s and shoulds’ you will be finding it increasingly difficult to feel happy. The perfectionist attempts to compensate for raging self-doubt through excessive control, rigidity, incredible effort and other self-defeating behaviours.
Trying to be perfect creates stressful living conditions and pushes others away. It leaves us with a sense of having failed and not being good enough.
Instead adopt a new motto for life, ‘Progress not Perfection,’ and ‘stop must-erbating!’.
Use food as medicine!
Eat a healthy, nutritious and balanced diet, which supports your brain chemistry and production of dopamine, endorphins, norepinephrine and serotonin. Eating little and often prevents fluctuations in blood sugar levels and ensures that we have good energy reserves without feeling lethargic, confused, irritable or frustrated.

_______________________________________________________________________________________

10 STEPS TO RELAXATION

IDEALLY, take five minutes for yourself each day and attempt to keep to as regular a time as possible during the day or evening (not after a heavy or evening meal) and whenever necessary.

1. Remove any contact lenses/glasses, and loosen any tight clothing.

2. Sit comfortably in a chair and if possible, with some head support, or lie down. Uncross your legs and place your arms in a relaxed position.

3. Notice your familiar surroundings and sounds, so that you can easily and comfortably let them go when you are ready to do so. When you are ready, close your eyes.

4. Concentrate on your breathing. Take a few deep breaths and hold it - only for a moment – and then breathe out slowly. With each breath out, give yourself a positive message to let go and relax.

5. Focus your attention on the part of your body that you feel is more relaxed than any other, and allow that special feeling or sensation to spread outwards to other surrounding muscles and to all parts of your body.

6. Imagine yourself at the top of a staircase with 10 steps. Take each step down, counting from one to ten, in your own time.

7. On the count of 10 imagine a journey to a very special comfortable place (perhaps somewhere you have been before, or somewhere even more special that you create for this purpose).

8. Notice something of significance to you so that you can memorise it and become familiar with your place. Enjoy being there, comfortable, at ease and totally relaxed. Explore just what it is that you need for yourself at this particular time, that you can take as a gift and bring it back with you.

9. When you feel ready, comfortably make your way back to the steps of the staircase, and take each step in your own time and positively, counting from 10 to 1, and, feel more and more refreshed with each step.

10. Become aware of your whole body and, feeling more and more alert, become aware of your total control as you open your eyes to that feeling of refreshment.

Inner Peace (Stress Management/Relaxation Programme)

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Desiderata

Go Placidly Amid the noise and the haste and remember what peace there may be in silence

As far as possible, without surrender be on good terms with all persons. Speak you truth quietly and clearly, and listen to others, even the dull and ignorant; they too have their story. Avoid loud and aggressive persons, they are vexatious to the spirit. If you compare yourself to others you may become vain and bitter, for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.

Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans. Keep interested in your career however humble; it is real possession in the changing fortunes of time. Exercise caution in your business affairs, for the world is full of trickery. But let this not blind you to what virtue there is; many persons strive for high ideals, and everywhere life is full of heroism. Be yourself especially do not feign affection. Neither be cynical about love; for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment it is as perennial as the grass. Take kindly the counsel of the years gracefully surrendering the things of youth.

Nurture the strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune. But do not distress yourself with imaginings. Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness. Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars: You have a right to be here. And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should. Therefore be at peace with God, whatever you conceive Him to be; and whatever your labours and aspirations, in the noisy confusion of life, keep peace with your soul. With all it’s shams, drudgery and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world. Be cheerful. Strive to be happy

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Don’t Quit

When things go wrong, as they sometimes will,

When the road you’re trudging seems all up hill,

When the funds are low and the debts are high,

And you want to smile, but you have to sigh,

When care is pressing you down a bit,

Rest, if you must- but do not quit.

Life is queer with its twists and turns,

As everyone of us sometimes learns,

And many a failure turns about,

When he might have won had he stuck it out,

Don’t give up, though the pace seems slow,

You might succeed with another blow.

Often the goal is nearer than

It seems to a faint and faltering man,

Often the struggler has given up,

When he might have captured the victors cup,

And he learned too late, when the

Night slipped down,

How close he was to the golden crown.

Success is failure turned inside out,

The silver tint of the clouds of doubt,

And you never can tell how close you are,

It may be near when it seems so far,

So stick to the fight when your hardest hit,

It’s when things seem worst that you must not quit.

Thought, Feelings & Action (Cognitive Behavioural Programme)

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

If you can keep your head when all about you

Are losing theirs and blaming it on you;

If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,

But make allowance for their doubting too;

If you can wait and not be tired of waiting,

Or being lied about, don’t deal in lies,

Or being hated don’t give way to hating,

And yet don’t look too good, nor walk too wise.

If you can dream – and not make dreams your master,

If you can think – and not make thoughts your aim,

If you can meet with triumph and disaster,

And treat those two impostors just the same;

If you can bear to hear the truth you’ve spoken

Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,

Or watch the things you gave your life to broken,

And stoop and build ‘em up with worn out tools.

If you can make one heap of all your winnings

And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,

And lose, and start again at your beginnings

And never breathe a word about your loss;

If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew

To serve your turn long after they are gone,

And so hold on when there is nothing in you

Except the will which says to the “Hold on!”

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,

Or walk with kings – nor lose the common touch,

If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you,

If all men count with you, but none too much;

If you can fill the unforgiving minute,

With sixty seconds worth of distance run,

Yours is the earth and everything that’s in it,

And – which is more – you’ll be a man my son!

Thought, Feelings & Action (Cognitive Behavioural Programme) Designed by Alpha Integrative Counselling Service

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The Most Destructive Habit……….Worry

The Greatest Joy……….Giving

The Greatest Loss……….Loss of Self Respect

The Most Satisfying work……….Helping others

The Most unforgiving personality trait……….Selfishness

The Most endangered species……….Dedicated Leaders

Our greatest natural resource……….Our Youth

The Greatest “Shot in the Arm”……….Encouragement

The Greatest problem to overcome……….Fear

The Most effective sleeping pill……….Peace of Mind

The Most Crippling Fatal Disease……..Excuses (Own It)

The Most Powerful force in Life……….Love (Not Dependency)

The Most Dangerous pariah……….A Gossiper

The Worlds Most Incredible Computer Ever……….The Brain

The Worst things to be without……….Hope

The Deadliest Weapon……….The Tongue

The Most Powerful words………..”I Can”

The Greatest Asset……….Faith

The Most worthless emotion……….Self Pity

The Most Beautiful Attire……….SMILE!

The Most prized possession……….Integrity

The Greatest Changes…………Communication (Not ESP)

The Most Contagious Spirit……….Enthusiasm

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Guide to do every day

1. Study something new every day-

2. Do at least one new thing different every day and make it part of your life

3. Keep a positive dairy

4. Go for a walk if possible

5. Get out of house at least once a day

6. Be nice to someone else at least once a day

7. Be good/treat yourself at least once a day

8. Phone at least one person everyday

9. Be good to yourself

10. It is ok to feel

11. It is OK to Think

12. Act as if to give the Confidence to achieve

13. Learn to trust yourself

14. Learn to trust others

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

LEARNING TO BE YOURSELF

THE PLUM

You should learn that you cannot be loved by everyone.

You may be the finest plum in the world-Ripe, juicy and succulent, and offer yourself to all.

But there will be people who do not like plums.

You must understand that if you are the world’s finest plum.

And someone you like doesn’t happen to like plums.

You have the choice of becoming a banana, but you must

Be warned that if you choose to become a banana

You will be a second-rate banana.

But you can always be the best plum.

You must also realise, if you choose to be a banana,

There will be people who do not like bananas.

Furthermore, you could spend your life trying to be the best banana, which is

Impossible if you are a plum,

You can seek again to be the best plum

-------------------------------------------------------------------

Letting go

To let go doesn’t mean to stop caring, It means I can’t do it for someone else.

To let go is not to cut myself off, It’s the realization that I can’t control another.

To let go is not to enable, but to allow learning from natural consequences.

To let go is to admit powerlessness, which means the outcome is not in my hands.

To let go is not to try to change or blame another, I can only change myself.

To let go is not to care for, but to care about.

To let go is not to fix, but to be supportive.

To let go is not to judge, but to allow another to be a human being.

To let go is not to be in the middle arranging all the outcomes,

but to allow others to affect their own outcomes.

To let go is not to be protective,It is to permit another to face reality.

To let go is not to deny, but to accept.

To let go is not to nag, scold or argue, but to search out my own shortcomings and to correct them.

To let go is not to adjust everything to my desires, but to take each day as it comes.

To let go is not to criticise and regulate anyone, But to try to become what dream I can be.

To let go is not to regret the past, but to grow and live for the future.

To let go is to fear less and to love more.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Just For Today

Just for today I will try to live through this day only, and not tackle my whole life problem at once. I can do something for twelve hours that would appal me if I felt I had to keep it up for a lifetime.

Just for today I will be happy. Most folks are as happy as they make up their minds to be.

Just for today I will adjust myself to what is, and not try to adjust everything to my own desires. I will take my ‘luck’ as it comes, and fit myself to it.

Just for today I will try to strengthen my mind. I will study. I will learn something useful. I will not be a mental loafer. I will read something that requires effort, thought and concentration.

Just for today I will exercise my soul in three ways: I will do somebody a good turn, and not get found out; if anybody knows of it, it will not count. I will do at least two things I don’t want to do – just for exercise. I will not show anyone that my feelings are hurt; they may be hurt, but today I will not show it.

Just for today I will be agreeable, I will look as well as I can, dress becomingly, talk low, act courteously, criticise not one bit, not find fault with anything and not try to improve or regulate anybody except myself.

Just for today I will have a programme. I may not follow it exactly, but I will have it. I will save myself from two pests: hurry and indecision.

Just for today I will have a quiet half hour all by myself, and relax. During this half hour, sometime, I will try to get a better perspective of my life.

Just for today I will be unafraid. Especially I will not be afraid to enjoy what is beautiful, and to believe that as I give to the world, so the world will give to me.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------

phone 01376552774

or E-Mail David@Counselling-Therapy-Treatment.co.uk